I'm gonna love myself, more than anyone else...
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Michelle
- 39, Female
- Mt.Airy(Mayberry), NC
- United States
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Profile Information
- Relationship Status:
- Single
- About Me:
- Where to begin? I got married at 17 to an older man, we were married for 13 years and had a beautiful son then my husband decided he was homosexual. That was a time of learning some hard life lessons. I meet someone after that who helped me feel alive , sexy and beautiful but unfortunatly he wasn't totally available. Then I meet and married someone who was VERY abusive and after 3 months I got away from him. But I went back to the one that "wasn't available" and saw him for 4 more years. All my life I tried to be what everyone else wanted me to be (good daughter, wife, girlfriend,etc.) ignoring my feelings and want I wanted just as long as everyone else was happy. Well I have finally got to a point in my life I love MYSELF , who I am , MY thoughts, MY feelings and MY opinions. I have got to where I am happy with ME. That is the most wonderful and liberating feeling. I feel I am finally comfortable in my own skin and am evolving into who I am meant to me. The one thing I have learned thur everything in my life is ... I used to not understand why I had to go thur all of these hardships and heartaches but if I hadn't .... I wouldn't be the person I am today.
We all go thur these hard times but they are life lessons for us to learn from. I am sure I will still be having hard times until my last breath but all I can hope for is that I can learn from them and become more aware of myself and what I value in me and the people around me. And that is what has made me the kind of women I always wanted to be ... A STRONG WOMAN!!
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SOUNDS LIKE WE HAVE SOME THINGS IN COMMON. I KNOW THAT I WANT TO BE HAPPY AGAIN, BUT I FEEL LIKE I AM LIVING MY LIFE FOR EVERYONE ELSE. ALWAYS WORIED ABOUT WHO I MIGHT HURT ON THIS PATH TO SELF DISCOVERY. I TOO HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR 13 YEARS. MY HUSBAND HAS HAD MULTIPLE AFFAIRS WITH THE SAME WOMAN(GIRL) 20 YEARS HIS JUNIOR. I HAVE NEVER FACED MY PAIN, AND NOW I HAVE MADE THE MISTAKE OF MOVING TO A NEW STATE WHERE I HAVE NO SUPPORT SYSTEM. I GUESS YOU COULD SAY I RAN AWAY FROM MY FEELINGS, AND AWAY FROM TEMPTATION FOR HIM(AWAY FROM HIS MISTRESS) WHAT I HAVE LEARNED ALONG THE WAY IS THAT NO MATTER HOW FAR YOU RUN, A BROKEN HEART ALWAYS FOLLOWS. I WANT TO BE FREE OF THIS FEELING. I HAVE 2 BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN 10 AND 6. THEY ADORE THEIR DAD, AND UNFORTUNATELY, I FEEL LIKE I AM LIVING A LIE FOR THEIR SAKE. I HAVE NO FEELING OF LOVE OR INTIMACY FOR HIM ANYMORE, BUT I DON'T HAVE THE COURAGE TO SAY IT OUT LOUD!! I AM WORKING ON MYSELF, AND HOPEFULLY THE ANSWERS WILL COME.